“It matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be.” — Albus Dumbledore, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
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Taken at Orem, Utah October 9, 2019.
Truth
One of my favorite photographs from my time in Bulgaria.
Graffiti. Sofia, Bulgaria. February 1996. Photo by Abel Keogh.
The Bridge
Took this photograph last week while driving the support van for Marathon Girl during her 20 mile run. It struck me as something you'd see in a horror novel. You know, kids ignore the sign, go on the bridge to jump into the river and have fun. Sooner or later they all end up dead. Yeah, that' s how my mind works.
Sleeping Beauties
Sunday, March 31, 2013 I went in search of Marathon Girl and this is what I found.
Summer Book Giveaway Winners
Thanks to all those who entered the Summer Book Giveaway contest by guessing where certain vacation photos were taken. The three winners were Mary, Charlynn, and Chelle. (I picked the winners by counting up the total number of comments and used a handy random number generator to pick three random numbers.)
Also, congrats to everyone who correctly guessed where the photos were taken. I’ve reposted the photos below with information on where they were taken along with why we happened to stop at each particular place. Enjoy!
Photo#1: Shoshone Falls, Idaho. On our way up to Boise to see my sister and her family, she suggested we stop here if we wanted our kids to stretch their legs. It's a nine mile detour off I-84 but well worth the trip.
Photo #2: Idaho State Capitol, Boise, Idaho. An unplanned stop. We were on our way to another part of Boise when my sister asked if we wanted to go check it out. Very beautiful and the entire building has been recently restored.
Photo #3: Old Idaho State Penitentiary, Boise, Idaho. Another unexpected stop and by far the most interesting place we visited. The kids enjoyed running around old cell blocks and "locking" themselves in cells. I got tons of ideas for scenes in upcoming novels and took tons of photos. The photo below was taken near the exercise yard.
Photo #4: Mount Rushmore, South Dakota. I was surprised how popular this place was and how many touristy things there are to do in the Rapid City area. (Thankfully my sister gave us the heads up before we went there.) Fun to see and the Black Hills are gorgeous.
Photo #5: Devil's Tower National Monument, Wyoming. Despite living in Casper, Wyoming for two years, I never made it up to this part of the state. The sheer size of the mountain is breathtaking. Sadly, there was no secret military base on the top of the mountain.
Photo #6: Devil's Gate, Wyoming. To keep our devil-themed Wyoming trip, we stopped at Devil's Gate, Wyoming. Actually, we stopped by Martin's Cove which just so happens to be in the vicinity of Devil's Gate but thought that this was a more interesting photo. :-)
Then (2004) and Now (2012)
The day after Marathon Girl and I bought our first house, I took the following picture from the second-story bedroom window.
The day before we sold the same home, I took the following picture from the same window.
Seven years of changes. Seems like yesterday I took the top photo.
Now it's off to new adventures.
I can't wait.
Not Quite Tall Enough
Pictures of the Dead Wife
A lively discussion has broken out in the comments section of my “5 Signs a Widower is Serious About Your Relationship” post about photos of the late wife being in the house. Since this is a question I have to answer rather often via email, here’s my take on the issue.
For Widowers
The woman you’re dating should feel comfortable in your home. Period. It’s hard to fathom trying to spend time with someone only to have reminders everywhere that he there was another special person in your life that you loved enough to marry. Women already feel like they’re competing with a ghost without constant reminders of the late wife everywhere. Photos just reinforce that and make the woman worry about whether you can love her even more.
Once you become serious enough with a person that she’s coming over to your home on a somewhat regular, take down the photos and put them in a box. Just because there’s no photos of the late wife in your home doesn’t mean that you’ve stopped loving her. You can take them out of the box and look at them when she’s not around if you want. If you’re serious about starting a new chapter in your life, please show this new woman the same respect you showed your late wife. Keeping photos up makes her feel like some piece of meat that’s there to fill the hole in your heart or to take the place of the late wife. Try and treat this new woman the same way you’d like to be treated.
Also, don’t put the burden of taking the photo down on the woman you’re dating. Don’t tell her that you’ll take it down if she’s uncomfortable. The woman you’re dating doesn’t need to be dragged into this issue. Be a man and take it down yourself.
The only exception I make to the photo rule is if you have minor children living at home. Odds are your kids are having a hard enough time with you dating. The last thing they need is for you to strip every memory of their mom from their home. But maybe instead of 10 pictures of her in the living room, try 2 or 3 and let the kids hang the rest up in their room.
For Women Dating Widowers
Don’t run screaming out of his house the first time you go there and see a photo of the late wife on his wall. If he a new widower and/or you’re one of the first women he’s seriously dated, he may not think twice about the photograph bothering you. For him it may simply be the way his house has been for years.
What you want to look for is progress. After visiting his house several times are their sings that the photos slowly coming down? Does he go out of his way to make you feel comfortable in his home? Is he treating you with the love and respect you deserve or is he taking you for granted and insensitive to your feelings?
Please keep in mind that the house is not yours. If you go in and make demands about how things should change, the widower’s going to view you as a controlling hag and get out of the relationship as soon as he can. IMHO you can’t make requests about changing the house for her look to yours until you have a ring on your finger.
Also, will you please stop sleeping with widowers who still has photos of the dead wife in the bedroom? Do you enjoy feeling like a mistress? Because that’s how the widower’s treating you. Please have a modicum of respect for yourself and tell the widower you’re not getting in bed as long as there are photos of the dead wife looking down at you.
Finally, if you don’t see signs that the widower is moving on or willing to make you comfortable in his home, grow a backbone and end the relationship. There are other men out there who will be glad to treat you like a queen. Don’t settle for someone that wants you to be number two. And when you end it, don’t forget to tell the widower know why you’re ending it. If he loves you he’ll make the necessary changes in regards to the late wife’s photos.
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Frozen in Time
No, these pictures aren’t from the planet Hoth. They’re views of frozen Utah Lake and the surrounding area that I took February 17, 2008 as reminder of how cold this winter has been. Since then, temperatures have risen and the snow has begun to melt. Maybe spring will arrive after all. It should be noted though Marathon Girl and I are sick of the cold, our kids had a good time digging through the snow to find the ice and walking on the frozen lake. They didn’t want to leave even after the sun set and the temperatures dropped.
Looking northwest across the lake
Looking northest toward the mountains
Looking southwest as the sun sets