Earlier this month Marathon Girl and I took the family on a camping trip to the La Sal Mountains east of Moab, Utah. We had a great time camping, river rafting, and visiting many state and national parks. Highly recommend the trip to the area if you've never been. Here's some photos from our 6-day adventure.
Because dating a widower comes with a host of unique challenges, often women who are dating them focus on widower-related issues and overlook six important areas of compatibility. In this first of a two-part series Abel Keogh discusses the first three areas of compatibility you need to consider before you decide to spend the rest of your life with a widower.
On of the most difficult things widowers have to adjust to is taking over the chores that the late wife took care of such as cooking, cleaning, or finances. In this video Abel Keogh discusses the best way for widowers to learn how to do chores that the late wife took care of and, if they have kids living at home, how to get the kids to help pick up some of the slack.
Note: This video was scheduled to be posted on June 13. But due to an impending vacation, I forgot to post it here. Enjoy!
Since dating has drastically changed since widowers were courting their late wife, it can be very disconcerting for then to enter the dating waters. In this video Abel Keogh talks widowers through the good, better, and best way to find someone who's interested in dating and perhaps marrying a widower.
When is the Right Time to get rid of the Late Wife's Things?One of the hardest things widowers have to do is get rid of the late wife's things. When is the best time and the best method of doing that? In this video, Abel Keogh walks you through tips and tricks that can make this process easier. In addition he discusses the cathartic and cleansing effects of getting rid of objects that tie widowers to the past.
This weekend I was able to accompany some youth, including my oldest son, on a church sponsored trip to Central and Southern Utah to do some hiking. Photos from the adventure are below.
Recently I did a webinar with the Open to Hope foundation about celebrating Father's Day when you've lost a child or father. You can watch the webinar below below.
About the webinar: Father’s Day honors fathers and celebrates fatherhood. Yet for fathers who have lost a child or father, the day can be difficult or painful. Join author Abel Keogh, Dr. Heidi Horsley and Dr. Gloria Horsley who will discuss how you can manage this holiday. If you are a father who has lost a child or someone who has lost their father, this webinar is a perfect way to start the journey toward hope and healing.
Widowers are usually ready to date again before their friends and family are done grieving. As a result it can be hard for them to learn that the widower is dating soon after the death of his wife. In this video, Abel Keogh walks widowers how to break the news to their family, the late wife's family, and their kids about dating again.
With all the emotional upheaval that comes with losing a spouse, it can be hard for widowers to know if they're ready to date again. In this video, Abel Keogh talks about how widowers can know if they're ready to date and, when they take that step, what pitfalls to avoid to make the experience as enjoyable as possible.
In order to start a new chapter in his life, every widower needs to reconcile their past and put the love and memories of the late wife in a special place in their heart. However doing this isn’t easy. It takes desire to start a new life, put the past behind you, and the courage to open your heart again. In this video, Abel walks widower and those who are dating them the steps one needs to go through in order to successfully start a new relationship that will endure until death do you part.
Years ago when I lived in Bulgaria, the most popular music group was a band called Авеню (pronounced Avenue). I sent a couple of tapes and CDs (yes, it was that long ago) of their music home and much to my surprise my then girlfriend and family liked the music. I lost track of the group after I returned to the States. A few years ago, much to my surprise, I found they had a channel on YouTube and had produced a lot of music over the years. A couple days ago, they released another album and posted one song from that album on their YouTube channel.
Seeing how I've never mentioned this band before, I thought I'd post some of their more recent music videos for those who are interested in hearing music from other countries. Most of the music, if sung in English, would probably find its way to an American soft rock station. Even if you can't understand the word, maybe you'll enjoy the music.
Sights, smells, and sounds are all things that can trigger memories of the past. When it comes to widowers these triggers can lead to an emotional breakdown. If you’re dating a widower who is prone crying when “their song” is played or where trips and nights out seem to trigger endless stories of the late wife, this video will help you navigate through these emotional landmines so that you can know whether or not the widower you’re dating is ready to move on.
Your widower wants to visit the cemetery to pay respect to his late wife. Is this a red flag or a sign he’s not ready to move on? Should you support him and let him go or even accompany him to her grave? In this video Abel Keogh talks about cemetery visits, setting boundaries, and what to look for in order to tell if these visits are helping him move forward or holding him back.
Most widowers start dating soon after the death of the late wife and usually well before they’re emotionally ready for a committed relationship. In this video Abel Keogh walks you through some widower psychology so you can better know if the man you’re dating is serious about your relationship or just using you for emotional support until someone better comes along. So, how long does it take a widower to fall in love again? The answer may surprise you.
Dating a widower who has adult children? If so, then you know the widower’s adult children aren’t usually thrilled about their father’s new relationship. In the third of a three-part series dealing with widowers and their adult children, Abel discusses:
- What a widower should do if you’re not invited to family events
- The best way to deal with children who act out toward you at family events
- How to handle adult children who are still grieving and don’t want to see their dad start a new chapter.
Dating a widower who has adult children? If so, then you know the widower’s adult children aren’t usually thrilled about their father’s new relationship. In the second of a three part series dealing with widowers and their adult children, Abel discusses:
- How do deal with children who feel entitled to the widower’s estate
- What do to if his kids think you’re a gold digger
- The best way to handle his attention seeking adult children on social media
Dating a widower who has adult children? If so, then you know the widower’s adult children aren’t usually thrilled about their father’s new relationship. In the first of a three part series dealing with widowers and their adult children, Abel discusses:
- What to do when the widower puts his adult children’s needs before yours
- The best way to get kids who have failed to launch out of the house and out on their own.
Part 2 drops next Wednesday.
Moving in with a widower can be risky. It can be hard to know whether he's ready to move on or just looking to fill the hole in his heart? The truth is most of the time, moving in with a widower ends in disaster. The woman makes most of the sacrifices while the widower does nothing. This video discusses red flags you should watch for and, if you decide to move in, things the widower needs to do BEFORE you make that commitment.
This Widower Wednesday video isn't for everyone. Each person has their own views about sex and when it's the right time to become intimate with someone you love. I'm not going to tell you when you should or shouldn't sleep with a widower. That's a personal decision. The three things I discuss in this video about sex and intimacy with widowers are:
1. How Widowers Think About Sex after Losing a Spouse
2. How Setting Intimacy Boundaries will Weed Out Widowers Just Looking for a Sexual Relationship
3. Things Widowers Should do to Make Sure Their Late Wife Isn't Part of Your Intimacy
Dating a widower comes with a unique set of challenges. Some of these challenges come from the widower's minor children (defined as under 18 and living at home). In the final of a three part series, Abel Keogh discusses the following issues related to a widower’s minor children:
- Your role in celebrating events like the late wife's birthday.
- What to do with pictures and mementos of their mother
- Tips and tricks for dealing with kids and grief.